Social Situations and Body Language

Have you ever walked into a social situation, ready to meet new people? Of course, everyone has at some point. Especially as new students at college we are exposed to social events and big group events almost everyday; class, meetings, parties, etc. When we walk up to a group, maybe unconsciously, we judge people by how they carry themselves. Don't deny it!

Let's go through some hypothetical situations. You walk into a room and there are two people on the couch, one on the chair and two standing. The guy on the chair has his elbows on his knees and his head down, texting on his phone. One of the girls on the couch has her legs crossed with her foot bouncing as she bites her nails. The other girl on the couch has both feet on the floor, leaning forward and telling a story with her hands with a big smile on her face. One of the guys standing has good posture with his hands in his pockets and his smiling as he listens to the story. The last guy has his arms crossed as he sort of looks around the room at the other people. These are the very first things we catch whether we know it or not.

What are your first impressions of these people? Good posture and a high head show confidence. When someone is thinking tall, they don't disappear into the crowd, no matter their height in feet or inches. A bouncing leg, twitching fingers, or biting on fingers show nervousness. If you came across someone like the first girl on the couch the most common first impression is that she is uncomfortable. There are also things called open or closed positions. Crossed legs or arms or slouching while sitting are closed positions. This usually keeps people from approaching. There are also a few things that give away that someone is relaxed and open to people or conversation. The hands in the pockets or feet flat on the floor are examples of openness. It is so much easier to confront a new person that is open rather than closed. Lastly, facial expression can make a big impression as well. Bright eyes? Big smile? These can both make good impressions on people when you meet them. Let's say you walk into the group and introduce yourself to someone. Do they greet you with eye contact? I find it much easier to get to know someone if they make eye contact with you.

My question is, are our assumptions from some one's body language reflective of their personality? We will have to just try to put those first judgements aside and get to know someone.